The Smell of Saturday

I am headed for Tahoe, and isn't this going to be grand... Snow, friends, scenery. Yeah, well after cleaning out my car and making sure she was spotless, I tromped down the stairs of my apartment, made my way through the sidewalk and parked it behind the wheel. The sun was shining and I was feeling good. Sniff... sniff, "Man something stinks like crap," I thought to myself. Checked the left foot, all clear. Took a look at the bottom of my right Puma and about yacked! I had managed to trek right through a gargantuan Rottweiler poo on my way to the Buick. I took the shoe off and draped it out the window as I made my way down Castro St. What was I gonna do?! There is no grass in the city to wipe my sneaker in! I spotted a tree surrounded by some weeds near the street, so I pulled over and hopped over to the tree with shoe in hand. I start to wipe the shoe on the tree and it is just not getting the job done. So I thought, I will get a good hand full of these weeds and rub them on the bottom of my shoe. As I reach in to grab a wopping hand full, I realize that they are covered in the world's smallest prickers. Now I have a smelly Puma and a hand pull of about 90 prickers. I really might cry at this point. I call my buddy John who I was going to go pick up, and tell him to meet me at his apartment well armed with paper towels and 409 spray. To wrap up, he de-pooed my shoe and we made it Tahoe for John's inaugural snowboarding experience- I am sure he will be awesome. He seems to naturally pick up everything.